5 things I did not know about Istikharah

The answers we seek may not always be immediate or obvious. But how have we understood Istikharah?

Jan 26, 2025

Bismillah, A Step For Our Deen!

Istikharah has been a trending prayer because of how social media hypes it up. But have we understood the depth of Istikharah prayer, and what it actually means?

5 things I did not know about Istikharah

1. Istikharah may not detach emotions

We ask Allah to turn away anything that is not good for us. But that does not mean our emotions for something or someone would immediately fade away. Perhaps Allah is nurturing your emotional growth and resilience by guiding you to practice sabr over your feelings.

Just because we feel it, does not mean we should act upon it.

2. Istikharah is not a guarantee of an easy path

Even after Istikharah, the right path may come with challenges that test your patience and faith. Trust in Allah’s guidance, that He will guide you to the path best for you, even if the journey is difficult.

3. Istikharah dua should be read how the prophet ﷺ read it

The words of the Prophet ﷺ holds unmatched wisdom and eloquence. Strive to learn and recite the dua in Arabic to capture the depth of the prayer.

4. Istikharah is about aligning actions to Allah’s Decree

Istikharah is not about validating our personal agendas or desires. Instead, it is to seek Allah’s guidance so that whatever we do will align to His Decree. Some important things to remember while praying Istikharah:

Surrender in Allah’s Wisdom
Accept the possibility that some feelings or ideas are not meant to be acted upon
Trust that Allah will replace with something better if He doesn’t give you what you want at first

5. Istikharah is not only for big decisions

You can pray istikharah for anything that leaves you unsure; whether it’s choosing a study path, resolving a conflict or deciding how to respond to an opportunity.

Remember that Allah is The Most Generous, and He responds to the one who calls for Him, so ask Him often, for both small and big things.

Quranic Guidance on decision making

On top of our Istikharah prayer, we should also learn how to make rational decisions according to Quranic Guidance.

And when you have decided, then rely upon Allah. Indeed, Allah loves those who rely upon Him.
Surah Ali Imran 3:159

This verse reminds me to rely upon Allah, to have tawakkul in His Wisdom, Power & Plan. And Allah reminds us that He loves and want us to rely upon Him.

The verse above puts two themes together - action and then reliance upon Allah. Making a decision is an active effort in life, stressing that we have to decide, make the effort, and then put our trust in Allah. This is also mentioned in Surah An-Najm 53:39, that man will only achieve what he strives for.

Quranic Guidance on something we dislike

… But perhaps you hate a thing and it is good for you; and perhaps you love a thing and it is bad for you. And Allah knows, while you know not.
Surah Al-Baqarah 2:216

This verse reminds me that our emotions may be the opposite of what is best for us. And we have to trust in Allah’s Knowledge. This is also why we have to be careful and avoid in asking for specific things - we do not know if it is the best option for us even if we feel like it. Free ourselves from the limitations of our own perspective.

Quranic Guidance on the best way forward

And whoever emigrates for the cause of Allah will find on the earth many [alternative] locations and abundance. And whoever leaves his home as an emigrant to Allah and His Messenger and then death overtakes him—his reward has already become incumbent upon Allah. And Allah is ever Forgiving and Merciful.
Surah An-Nisa 4:100

Allah assures that if what we do is for His cause, we will find abundance and opportunities on Earth. He promises rewards, even if death were to reach us while striving for His cause.

Ultimately, are our decisions truly for Allah and His Messenger ﷺ?

In time, it may become evident if our intention was to be doing things for Allah and His Messenger, or just for our own benefit.

To conclude, Istikharah is more than just a prayer for making decisions. It is part of our journey of trust, surrender and aligning ourselves with Allah’s Wisdom and Decree for us.

And Allah knows best.